Accidental pregnancy is hilarious

I went to see Knocked Up last night with a guy I've been seeing. A couple of weeks ago when he first mentioned it, I had it confused with an ad I'd seen for an awful concept movie about a guy getting pregnant. When I saw the trailer and realized it was not that movie, I found a new reason to be irritated. Are we supposed to believe that an attractive woman with a lot going for her would a) sleep with this guy b) decide to have his baby and c) actually raise it with him? What a load of horse shit!

The night before, I'd seen Waitress with a friend. Another comedy about accidental pregnancy but from a distinctly female (and more realistic) point of view. She doesn't tell the father (even though it's her jerk husband), she doesn't try to make it work "for the baby" (and instead has a delicious affair) and in the end it's she who matures into a person who can now do what's best.


I remembered an hour into Knocked Up that I'd heard it wasn't a date movie. I felt a little sick watching men act like misbehaved little boys. My date, twice as old as the main character, was laughing his ass off at their inane antics. The kind of stuff that makes women roll their eyes and wonder why we've ever had sex with a man. I found myself swearing I'd never do it again.

In the film, the guys totally stick up for each other despite their obvious shortcomings or perhaps because of them. My date, defending the main character from my pre-movie critique felt compelled to say after each scene "I like him! He's sweet." I remarked, maturely, "well maybe YOU should marry him." I started to notice that the whole movie had this male love thing going on and my date was joyfully participating. I was kind of touched but also felt compelled not to hold his hand anymore.

But then the sick feeling suddenly dissipated. The story had slipped into a mature and insightful observation of the relationships between men and women and what it means to be an adult. I was hooked. It was intense - there really isn't anything funny about accidentally getting pregnant - and yet it was still silly and funny. I started marveling at how a man could take such a complex approach to gender relations. Judd Apatow remarkably did the same thing with 40-Year Old Virgin. Took a totally implausible premise and made it work in a real, not insulting, stupid fairy-tale way.

I was reminded of something a male friend of mine always says, that geeks are the best lovers. They have to be, he says, because they can't rely on their good looks or cool factor to get them laid. They actually have to work at it. Get to know women and what makes them tick. I started to think, that must explain how Apatow can so accurately represent his own gender in relation to women.

He sets us up thinking he's going to defend this stupid behavior but he's really allowing our characters to be vulnerable in front of us so he can turn them on their heads and say, if you want more, if you want a woman, a family, a life, you might have to work at it. My date loved the movie and I had to admit, it worked. Even though I felt like someone had snuck up behind me and whacked me over the head, it did make me laugh.

While I thought the main character's arc was completely flat - who was she? what did she want? and what was her conflict? - the storyline of the sister's family (brilliantly played by Apatow's real life wife and kids) was wonderfully satisfying. It's no 40-Year Old Virgin but it's still pioneering a better kind of comedy.